First Attempt - the Art of the Chesterhouse

Chesterhouse is a nonsense word. It was a red Herring!!! Muhahah.

So my first attempt went like this...and like that....now you know where the real g's at. Now lean like a Cholo. Elbows up side to side. Elb Elbows up side to side. I'm Brown I get down the girls love How I lean. Cuz I'm lean like a brisket. Smoke Hop Up side to Side Smoke Smoke Hop Up side top side.

So I stayed up till 3:00am or so with Robert and Preston in my car (for some reason) the night before my first attempt and I wasn't prepared in any manner to "smoke a brisket" as we say in the "Biz". Anyway so I woke up at 9:30, went to store, bought brisket, started fire, rubbed brisket and put the dude on there at around 11:00. The above picture is what it looked like after an hour or so.

Things I wasnt prepared for:

Thermometer: I didnt have an adequate thermometer. Note* meat thermometers only go up to 200. If you want to exceed 200 you cant use a meat thermometer. So i had to use an oven thermometer which was a pain in the ass because I had to open the chamber to check the temp, which if you ask El Smokeador, is a huge no-no.

Inviting Claire: Dont invite Claire to your BBQ. She wins at washers, sleeps in your guest bed. Terrible.

Beer: Note* beer makes you drunk . If you drink too much, you will no longer keep a close enough watch on the fire. At times the fire ranged from 145 to as high as 325. I can understand the 325 because when you add fuel to a low fire and you dont want it to go out you have to sometimes give it enough O2 to catch and then you can inhibit O2 flow to lower the temp. This i did. The 145 is unnaceptable. I was simply too drunk and forgot about fire.

Pretty much same pic as above.

Time: Having not smoked in a while I had forgotten that the time factor is huge. You are trying to slow cook a hugely dense, generally tough piece of meat. If I was braising this fucker in my crock pot, I'd leave it for like 24 hours. no kidding. And it would be delicious, in a red wine mire puax braising fluid, roasted garlic...I digress. Anyway, the brisket needed time at constant temp wrapped. This i didnt do as well as I should have. I let the internal temp get too high before i wrapped it, which i dont think effected it too much, but after I wrapped it I did not keep the temp steady and straight for the requisite time. As a result the inner core of the brisket was tougher than it should have been and needed an hour and a half more of cooking or more. Oh well, live and learn

Here it is after 4 hours or so. Note the Bacon.

Things I did right:

Smoke Flavor: I got the smoke flavor into this brisket straight. Hardcore style. The smoke ring was perfect. UGHHH DOUBLE UP UGGH UGHH !

Rub: I found an internet Rub. Here it is:

• 5 tablespoons paprika
  
• 2 1/2 tablespoons salt
  
• 2 tablespoons garlic powder
  
• 2 tablespoons onion powder
  
• 4 teaspoons black pepper
  
• 4 teaspoons dried parsley
  
• 2 teaspoons cayenne pepper
  
• 2 teaspoons ground cumin
  
• 1 teaspoon ground coriander
  
• 1 teaspoon dried oregano
  
• 1/4 teaspoon hot chili powder
  

Instead of chili powder and cayenne pepper I substituted some fresh ground (by me) dried chile piquins from Pendrey's which added a perfect spice and additional smokey flavor. The rub worked out perfect. All who tased my brisket commented on how good it was.

Drinking and playing Washers: This was a good idea.

Smoking Bacon and Serving as Appetizers: Lane taught me this trick. Bacon is deliscious on a smoker and cooks fast and holds the smoke flvor VERY well. You can see delicious bacon in the above picture I recommend this at all times. even when not smoking (?)

Summary. All in all the Brisket turned out pretty darn good for a first unprepared attempt. A bunch of people came over and we all had fun. The brisket, although everyone raved about how good it was, was a B/B-. The only reason it was that good was becasue of my prior smoking experience. It would not be terribly hard to move this to an A- brisket. With just a little more gumption and hardcoreness.

I will likely move on to chickens and salmon before i return to battle brisket again, but HEAR ME NOW BRISKET, I SHALL RETURN.

Finished Product

(thanks to Allison, Claire, and Matt "I dont want a beard" Beard for all of the pics)

(thanks also for all who came)

-SmokeHopper